Anonymous said: I recently found out my boyfriend was talking to another girl when I kind of being nosy on his facebook without him knowing. He calls her "baby" and such, uses hearts and whatnot when he chats with her, talks to her all the time, like he used to with me, and has even invited her over to his house. I was extremely hurt. How do I confront him about this without directly telling him that I violated his privacy? & Is there any chance of reconciliation or is this flat out cheating and our relationship is totally over?
It depends on what your definition of cheating is, but in my book, talking to someone new isn’t cheating, it’s actually DOING SOMETHING that’s cheating.. like kissing, sex, etc. But there’s also EMOTIONAL CHEATING, which it sounds like what he did.
I can’t say your relationship is over just because he cheated — that’s up to you.
You have to tell him .. he can be mad about you violating his privacy, but he’ll only be mad cuz you found out. He should feel stupid that he even tried to hide it from you when he could have been honest with himself and just break up with you. He can’t have both of you and some guys try to do that. At the same time, he could also be talking to someone new cuz he’s not happy with you and that’s something you will have to duke out with him.
If you can forgive him for what he did, given that he didn’t go any further than just talking to her and flirting with her, then there IS reconciliation and you two can work it out. Otherwise, i’d call it quits if homie already has his eye on someone else. But that’s just me, i can’t stand shit like that — if my man isn’t happy with me, i either make him happy and find a compromise, or set him free to go ahead and be with someone else who DOES make him happy. Sometimes you just have to be reasonable and realistic .. so the choice is yours. :)